White's Warren
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Wanted for Murder

Jehova aka "God" aka "Yahweh" aka "Elohim" aka "The Father"

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This being is wanted in connection with the first degree murder of thousands of people in the city of Sodom, tens of thousands of Egyptians during the Exodus, and hundreds of thousands during the Great Flood; and for the criminally negligent homicide of more than five billion people; and for other crimes against humanity.

On or about 3000 BC, the suspect began a campaign of terror and intimidation against those who would not bend to his rule. This included acts of chemical and biological warfare (e.g., poisoning of wells and plagues), the destruction of major waterways (e.g., the Red Sea), the direct manipulation of the elements resulting in floods during which thousands drowned and famines during which millions have starved to death.

The equally serious charges of negligent homicide of billions of people stem from three separate acts:


Whereabouts
The last confirmed sighting of the suspect was nearly five thousand years ago on Mt Sinai. However, the suspect is known to be a master of disguise, appearing to one witness as a burning bush, and to others in their dreams.


Associates
The suspect is the ringleader of a vast crime syndicate known among its members and clients as "Heaven". The syndicate is headed by three key figures:


The syndicate's key lieutenants are all members of the Angel Family. They include:

Although much less powerful than any of the Angel family, Jiving Johnny Paul, aka "The Pope", and his underlings exercise considerable influence over Heaven's cult followers, i.e., the millions of people who The Father controls through a combination of intimidation (e.g., threats of being burned in hell), bribery (e.g., the promise of eternal afterlife in Heaven), and brainwashing (e.g., forced pseudo-cannibalistic acts). The Pope's predecessors and their underlings are known to have killed and tortured thousands during the Inquisition, and to have promoted the killing of millions through conflicts, known as "holy wars", with rival gangs.

All of these beings are extremely dangerous and should be avoided at all costs. If you see or hear of any of these entities, please contact The Ghostbusters at once. There is a reward. Here on earth.


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